Yesterday was an awkward word day.
Tomorrow isn’t looking too hot either.
Well something came out of Wednesday.
Not sure how I feel about Wednesday’s words.
Dr. C told us to up the ante next week.
Write like your grades depend on it.
Use metaphor, get abstract.
Face those words that you hate.
Work around the discomfort.
I’m already pretty uncomfortable,
thank you very much.
I’m uncomfortable with myself.
Because even when I’m not writing about myself,
I find myself somewhere on the page.
Have you ever found yourself somewhere unexpected?
It can scare the heck out of you.
You find yourself staring at the page,
asking if that is really you.
You poke the words, tasting how they feel in your mouth.
Sometimes they taste sweet.
And sometimes you want to spit them out.
But bitterness doesn’t mean they aren’t true.
And sweetness can be a mask for lies. Poison.
So I’ll just have to accept that this weeks words were hard to swallow.
But they are true.
Even if I don’t want them to be.
And I hope that next week’s words don’t meet me with false security.
Because it’s time to take the safety off.
It’s time to embrace the sweetness and the bitterness.
And the insecurity.
It’s time to stop worrying about finding myself in strange places.
Focus on the thoughts.
Disregard the words.